I very much appreciate the replys.
I have learnt a lot about the G.B from this site. What I have learnt has made me realise, I can no longer be a fader, and i will be disfellowshipping myself. ( I realise for many that is not an option)
I guess the point of my O.P is after disfellowshipping:-
A) Should I then move on and lead an egotistical life offering only passive resistance to the W.T?
OR.
B) Should I continue to hate ( and what I have learnt on this site has created if not hatred then at least rage in side of me) Rage that I was deceived. Rage that these men know they are liers, and harlots of the worst kind, and are happy ruining people's life's.
I am not sure what I will do, I am not even sure what I can do. But now I am on the outside looking in, I don't want to simply talk excited, think up fabulous ideas, and actually accomplish nothing.( Which is what I accomplished as a witness)
Maybe I can change my neighbourhood, and with time awaken people in my former congregation. Maybe that would be a victory. However from a personal perspective I now honestly want to love life ( maybe that is selfish?) And to love life I simply can't waste it on hate. ( I appreciate it, if you have a different point of view)
The Rebel.